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FILM REVIEW: Chris Rock's Saw reboot "Spiral" is dizzyingly bad

In 2004 James Wan and Leigh Whannell unleashed their horror/thriller Saw upon hapless audiences, it was an instant financial and cultural success. The films sadistic serial killer and shocking twist cemented Wan and Whannell in the horror hall of fame (Wan and Whannell now boast the critically acclaimed Conjuring franchise and Invisible Man remake.

The raving success of the first Saw movie saw a sequel greenlit immediately, and subsequently every year thereafter. Unfortunately someone at the studio decided to shoehorn a bizarre twist into the end of every film, and soon enough the franchise reached its eighth iteration and the plot became so convoluted that even diehard fans had issues working out what on earth was happening between the blood and guts.

Enter Jigsaw, though we here at Isolated Nation gave it a scathing review (which I wholeheartedly disagree with), Jigsaw managed to pump just enough blood into the long dead franchise to garner yet another greenlight. Enter Chris Rock: I'm not too sure what Chris Rock saw in Saw, but I saw Chris Rock's Saw and it see-saws the line of being the worst Saw I ever saw.

Spiral: from the book of Saw follows Detective Zeke Banks (Chris Rock) and his police squad as they investigate a series of Jigsaw copycat killings that are targeting police officers with dodgy pasts.
Whilst the sheer majority of Saw films fall gracefully into the 'so bad they're good' category, Spiral is uniquely terrible.

Watching Spiral was like waking in a deteriorated bathroom with a leg chained to a radiator and the only way out to cut it off with a jigsaw. Spiral feels like an embarrassing ego project, where nothing technical was ever considered other than getting the film done and trying to make Chris Rock look cool. The cinematography of Spiral is flat and hopeless, cinematographer Jordan Oram has apparently never twisted the focal knob on a camera in his entire life. Capturing the ugliest film ever shown on the big screen.
Director Darren Lynn Bousman, whose helmed three other Saw films, proves that he should never direct another film again.

Screen writers Pete Goldfinger and Josh Stolberg, who wrote the MAGNIFICENT Jigsaw, should be trapped in a Jigsaw-esque trap where if they can't write a good film they have their fingers severed.
Every actor in Spiral is miscast, from Chris Rocks maverick detective, Marisol Nichols police captain, all the way to the eventual killer. No one suits their role or acts with any credibility.

The Saw franchise is best known for its grotesque traps, they’re moral dilemmas with a violent twist e.g. you’re a liar so bite your tongue off or die, but the Spiral traps are some of the worst in the franchise, they’re dull, uninspired and occasionally make no sense. The only joy available in Spiral is the fake mustaches characters don in flashback sequences to distinguish their age, and the fact that most of the main cast gets killed.

For fans of Chris Rock yelling in a car when things get tough, or iPhone 3 level cinematography, Spiral may find a fan in you. For fans of the Saw franchise, and horror enthusiasts alike, seeing Spiral is like being trapped in a Jigsaw-esque trap where you can gouge your eyes out or waste your precious time on earth watching Spiral.

Tie your worst enemy to a chair and put on Spiral.

0.5 / 5 Stars (just for the fake mustaches)